Squeeeeeee!!!
That’s me being super psyched because this year is going to be all kinds of AWESOME! OK, so I know I said I’m not really into New Year’s resolutions. Call me a big fat liar, because I DO have some resolutions this year!
The first one has to do with bullies. We all know MacKenzie can make my life MISERABLE at times. And then there’s Pat who I’m pretty sure has horns on his head that he hides underneath his ridiculously huge flat-ironed mop top.
You know how I’m always saying things in my head so no one hears them but me? NOT THIS YEAR! If MacKenzie gets all up in my face, I will NOT sink to her level. I’m a nice girl! But I am definitely going to tell her what’s what. I am NOT her doormat, and she CANNOT walk all over me!
In fact, I’m not cool with her walking all over anyone! Maybe I’ll get super serious about fighting bullying, kind of like a superhero fights crime.
I could lurk in the corners so I can catch her right before she does something HORRIBLE to some other innocent kid. Seriously, I’ve seen her make kids cry, shake, and even pee themselves (not naming any names, Julie Davies!!)
I think it would be pretty awesome to create some type of bully repellant spray.
It would have to smell really good, so bullies actually want to breathe it in….like a combination of hair spray, designer imposter perfume, and cupcakes. But then after it wafts around you for a few minutes, something clicks in your brain and you suddenly stop being a horrible human being.
I could make a BOATLOAD of cash selling this stuff! Just think about how many kids would buy it! Maybe they’d even sell it in school stores across the country. Meankiditis is a HORRIBLE epidemic, and I would have the ONLY cure!
But that’s enough about bullies. I have another resolution that I’m super psyched about. This year, I’m going to tell Brandon EXACTLY how I feel about him.
OK, so sometimes my legs feel like spaghetti noodles when he starts talking to me, and I have a hard time coming up with complete sentences because he’s SO dang cute.
But this year, I’m going to find the right moment, pull him aside, and say, well, hmm I don’t really know. It’s going to be REALLY good, I can tell you that much! I’m definitely going to let him know I think he’s awesome and that we should be a couple…like, a real one!
Seriously, it’s time Brandon and I started going out for real! Forget for a minute that we probably wouldn’t actually go anywhere. (Even if I were allowed to date, I’m not feeling the whole parents driving us to the movies thing…)
But we could walk around holding hands and stuff. And we’d pass each other love notes in class. I’m not talking about the kind that go, “Do you like me as more than a friend? Circle yes or no!”
I’m talking about serious, committed relationship notes. The kind that go, “You’re so sweet, you give me a tooth ache!” or “Does your family make juice for a living, because I think you’re very fine!”
Haha so clearly I need to work on my note writing skills. But the point is I’m ready to take our flirtation to the next level! The super serious, first kiss level.
What do you think I should say to Brandon? And what are YOUR New Year’s resolutions?