March 6, 2012 JASON BOOGER HAS A CRUSH ON ME!!! It’s always totally awesome to know someone has a crush on you, but this is one of those cases where I REALLY wish the person didn’t!! Despite what I wrote in the title, his name isn’t Jason Booger. It’s actually Jason Bugger, but since he spends most of homeroom picking his nose like he’s searching for gold up there, lots of people call him Jason Booger. I know, it’s totally mean! I don’t call him that, because I’m not a horrendous, soul-less bully, like SOME people I know (ahem, MacKenzie!!) But I’m also not super friendly with him. It’s not just because he picks his nose and he’s kind of weird…though he totally is. I’m pretty sure he’s never seen a deodorant stick, because he constantly has horrible body odor that smells a lot like Campbell’s chicken noodle soup. He also picks scabs off his arm and eats them. One time he had a big crusty scab stuck in his front tooth. At first I thought it was pizza, but then I saw the pussy open wound on his arm, and I realized he was popping scabs like Tic Tacs (yup, he has that many!) But that’s not why I’m not his friend. I can deal with weird…but being weird AND mean is a horrible combination! One day he barked at Brandon. I mean full on barked, like he was a rabid dog or something. And Brandon didn’t even do anything to him! He was just like, “Hey Jason, can I borrow a pen?” And Jason started growling like a demon pit bull ready to attack. I know what it’s like to love your pens. I have some really cool fine tip ones for art! But it’s NEVER occurred to me to protect mine like a watch dog on steroids! I don’t know what his deal is! Usually I just keep my distance, the same way I cross the street when I see a bull dog tied up in someone’s front yard. But the other day my English teacher decided to randomly pair everyone up with partners to write poems about fear, and I got him. I don’t know how teachers come up with ideas like this! Seriously, my teacher must have sat up all night thinking, “How can I make everyone in class as UNCOMFORTABLE as possible? I got! I’ll pair them up with kids they don’t know very well, and then tell them to write a poem about their feelings!” So that’s how we ended up sitting side by side, talking about things that scare us. For a while he just sat there looking at me in a kind of creepy way. I knew I had to say something to break the ice, but I was kind of afraid he’d bark at me. So I was like, “Um, so we’re supposed to write things we’re afraid of. I’m actually super scared of bull dogs!” I thought this way he’d cool it with the growling and stuff. Luckily, he didn’t start barking! But when he finally started talking, it was even scarier than that would have been. He went, “You’re really cute.” And then he tried to hand me a scab. SERIOUSLY!! He actually held out his hand, with a shy smirk on his face, like he was giving me a flower or a love note or something. Except all he had in his hand was a big nasty scab!! I suppose I should have been flattered. I mean, in his world scabs are like chocolate. But I SO didn’t want it!! And I definitely don’t want him crushing on me!! So I was like, “Um no thanks. I’m not a big fan of scabs!” Then I suggested we write our own poems and hand in two separate ones (so we wouldn’t have to talk any more). I really hope he was just joking around, because it would be totally uncool if he started leaving love scabs in my locker!! Dang it! My mom’s yelling for me to come do my homework. Ttyl!!