July 18, 2013 WHAT TO DO WHEN YOUR FRIENDS GOSSIP ABOUT YOU This question comes from Chloe (a different one!), who writes: At school my friends are nice, but at birthday parties they gossip about me and ignore me. Then when I am alone with them, they’re nice again. It’s so aggravating. Please give me advice!! My Advice: Hi Chloe! Let me start this advice column with an open letter to your “friends”: Dear Chloe’s “friends,” It seems that maybe you guys were absent on the day they covered friendship in school, so it’s time someone tells you what’s what! Looking out for your friend + valuing her + being nice to her ALL the time = super awesome friendship! Gossiping about your friend + ignoring her + being nice to her ONLY when other people aren’t around = super mean and not cool, AND grounds for suspension from friendship!! Please study this guide carefully, as there will be a quiz at the next party, and there will be NO make up test!!! Sincerely, A Dork That’s Learned A LOT About Being a Good Friend OK, now that I’ve gotten that out of the way, a little advice for you, Chloe! I know this is going to sound hard to do, because…well, it is! But you have to let your friends know that YOU get how friendship works, they’re not treating you right, and things have to change. Then you have to be the one giving this party-quiz. After you tell them that it’s not cool to talk about you behind your back, keep an eye out to see if they change (which means they value your friendship) or if they keep doing the same mean thing (which means they have no idea what an awesome friendship they’re ruining!) If they don’t pass this party-quiz, then it’s time for that suspension. The good news is that it’s a big school, and there are TONS of other people who paid attention during the friend lesson. More importantly, those girls will think you’re SO awesome that they’d never consider gossiping about you. They’ll be too busy laughing WITH you to laugh AT you with someone else! It may take a bit to find those girls, but trust me…you will! I just know there’s a Zoey and Nikki pair out there just dying to find their Chloe. 🙂 What do you guys think? Do you have any advice to add?