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May 29, 2014

WHEN YOUR BEST FRIEND IS BETTER THAN YOU

Advice Column May 29th

I really like my best friend, but it seems like I’m always second to her, no matter how hard I try. She’s better at art than me. In gym class, she finishes in the spot just ahead of me. And in cooking class, her pie is tastier than mine.

I know she’s my best friend and it’s not her fault, but I can’t help being jealous. I’m scared I might get really mad one day, and she might stop being my friend. Help!

Anonymous

Hi there, my new nameless pal. No fear, I’m here to help!

I know you think that your BFF is better at everything. But it seems HIGHLY unlikely that she’s a better friend than you! And let me tell you why…

You’re dealing with something SUPER difficult. Everyone gets annoyed when they feel like someone, ANYONE, constantly one-ups them. It’s even harder when it’s someone you’re close to.

But even though it’s your best friend who’s good at all these things, you’re aware that it’s not her fault that you feel this way, AND you’re looking out for her feelings.

For those reasons, I think you’re pretty awesome!

I know that doesn’t change that she’s a gym super star and you feel stuck in her fast-moving shadow, but there’s something you should know about the art and cooking things.

ANYTHING creative is subjective. That means some people like one thing, and other people like something else. So you may THINK she’s better than you in art, but I bet there are tons of people who’d disagree!

This one time, I went to this tiny art gallery with my mom, and I thought for sure Brianna could have done a better job than the artist, blindfolded, when she was two. And those paintings were selling for hundreds of dollars!

And as for cooking, my dad RAVES about my mom’s mad skills in the kitchen (except he doesn’t say, “mad skills” because he’s old and says old people stuff, like “Hot diggity!  I look so hip in my overalls!”).

But I think my mom’s food is about as appetizing as jellied moose nose. (Some people actually eat that…Google it!)

Even if you think you could get better at cooking and art, she’s not REALLY better at EVERYTHING. You just think that because you’re comparing yourself to her 24/7.

The truth is, you’re both unique people with your own skills and talents. There are some areas where she may shine a little more, and there are some areas where maybe you do.

Those may be things you haven’t found yet, or maybe you have an inner artist or cook just DYING to come out. You’ll only find out if you focus more on yourself, practice, and see what you can really do.

The next time you find yourself thinking, “She’s SO much better than me! I’ll never be as good as her!” Change it to, “NOBODY is better at being me than me. I’m good at lots of things, too…and I can get better if I work at them!”

What do you guys think? Do you have any advice to add?

Filed Under: My Diary, Nikki's Advice

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