May 29, 2014 WHEN YOUR BEST FRIEND IS BETTER THAN YOU IMPORTANT ANNOUNCEMENT! Meet Rachel Renée Russell and her daughters, Erin and Nikki, as they celebrate the release of their newest book Dork Diaries: Tales from a Not-So-Glam TV Star! Come see their DORKALICIOUS tour bus as they visit fans in Illinois, Missouri, Minnesota and Wisconsin. Enjoy a Live DJ! Photo booth! Prize wheel! Dork Diaries Dedication Locker! And lots more! Check out their tour schedule to see if they are visiting a city near you! Today’s question came in anonymously. It reads: I really like my best friend, but it seems like I’m always second to her, no matter how hard I try. She’s better at art than me. In gym class, she finishes in the spot just ahead of me. And in cooking class, her pie is tastier than mine. I know she’s my best friend and it’s not her fault, but I can’t help being jealous. I’m scared I might get really mad one day, and she might stop being my friend. Help! My Advice: Hi there, my new nameless pal. No fear, I’m here to help! I know you think that your BFF is better at everything. But it seems HIGHLY unlikely that she’s a better friend than you! And let me tell you why… You’re dealing with something SUPER difficult. Everyone gets annoyed when they feel like someone, ANYONE, constantly one-ups them. It’s even harder when it’s someone you’re close to. But even though it’s your best friend who’s good at all these things, you’re aware that it’s not her fault that you feel this way, AND you’re looking out for her feelings. For those reasons, I think you’re pretty awesome! I know that doesn’t change that she’s a gym super star and you feel stuck in her fast-moving shadow, but there’s something you should know about the art and cooking things. ANYTHING creative is subjective. That means some people like one thing, and other people like something else. So you may THINK she’s better than you in art, but I bet there are tons of people who’d disagree! This one time, I went to this tiny art gallery with my mom, and I thought for sure Brianna could have done a better job than the artist, blindfolded, when she was two. And those paintings were selling for hundreds of dollars! And as for cooking, my dad RAVES about my mom’s mad skills in the kitchen (except he doesn’t say, “mad skills” because he’s old and says old people stuff, like “Hot diggity! I look so hip in my overalls!”). But I think my mom’s food is about as appetizing as jellied moose nose. (Some people actually eat that…Google it!) Even if you think you could get better at cooking and art, she’s not REALLY better at EVERYTHING. You just think that because you’re comparing yourself to her 24/7. The truth is, you’re both unique people with your own skills and talents. There are some areas where she may shine a little more, and there are some areas where maybe you do. Those may be things you haven’t found yet, or maybe you have an inner artist or cook just DYING to come out. You’ll only find out if you focus more on yourself, practice, and see what you can really do. The next time you find yourself thinking, “She’s SO much better than me! I’ll never be as good as her!” Change it to, “NOBODY is better at being me than me. I’m good at lots of things, too…and I can get better if I work at them!” What do you guys think? Do you have any advice to add?
Nikki says October 24, 2014 at 10:44 pm I have a friend just like that! I feel so bad comparing myself to her all the time…I guess I’ll just have to change my perspectives on life, school, etc. To the Person who wrote the question: I feel you girl! -N
AnimatedEmoticons says October 23, 2014 at 7:47 pm I actually have a bestie like that too and felt the same way.
Louise(actually ana but ppl or friends I mean call me Louise) says October 22, 2014 at 10:42 pm OMG!!!!! THE SAME HER!!! My friend is actually trying to be better than me…her evil genius plan is working. She has things to relate to me but she is really competitive when I try to do something I’m usually good at. Yet she puts more effort (ALWAYS) and I did have a major tantrum, so yes. Don’t worry though. Things will hopefully get better. 🙂
BLUE LOVER 0 says October 22, 2014 at 2:09 pm I know how you feel I have this friend named Mia and we are like sisters forever and we have this dance class together and she is like the best dancer EVER. I wish I was her.nI love to dance its my passion but i don’t know what to do tell her how I feel or let her be in the spot light. This is horrible I love her but I don’t know what to do.