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Dork Diaries Book 14

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March 8, 2017

MY BFF THINKS I’M COPYING HER!!

Ask Nikki Blog Art March 8th

Hey Nikki! I have a big problem. My friend and I are very similar—we both like the color blue, we both like the same foods, and have the same hobbies. I know you might be thinking that’s a good thing, but lately my friend has been first with things we want to do and now it seems like I’m copying her! I want to do the things I like, but not anymore because she’s getting mad at me for copying. What should I do?

Copycat Clone

Hey CC!

Can I call you CC? 🙂 It doesn’t feel right to call you a copycat OR a clone, because you’re just doing you! And there’s nothing wrong with that! YOU just happen to have a lot in common with your BFF…which makes total sense!!

But, this is a tricky situation. I can see why it might be awkward if it’s like you’re always copying, even if you’re not. You don’t want to be a copycat. But you also don’t want to stop following your heart just because of how it might look. That’s no good!

Here’s a question I have: why is your friend first at everything? I mean, even before you started to feel awkward about copying? I’m TOTALLY not saying you are copying her. But here’s what I’m thinking: Maybe she’s always been a little more confident in saying what she likes and doing what she wants. Maybe you hold back a little? And then she looks like she’s the one who’s doing everything first.

And that’s a crazy cycle, because the more you’re afraid of looking like a copycat, the more you hold back, and the more she gets to everything first.

So, I think part of the solution here is for you to be MORE confident about what you like and want to do! Now, it’s easier said than done. It probably helps if you understand WHY you hold back. Are you worried what people will think? Are you worried what you like is weird or wrong in some way? If so, try to remember that DORKS RULE!!! And if you like something, that’s all you need to know! It doesn’t matter what anyone else thinks about it. AND it sounds like you have pretty good instincts for stuff, since it usually turns out that your BFF likes the same things.

So the next time you think you want to try wearing your hair a new way, or you want to try out for the soccer team, or you discover this rock band that’s SO cool, DON’T WAIT to do that thing or tell people you’re into something. Trust yourself and go for it! And chances are, your BFF will soon say, “Wow, you know, I really love that band, too!!” (Or not! You guys don’t have to be in sync on everything!!)

But, here’s the other thing. This is your BFF, right? I mean…have you talked to her about this? It might feel weird and awkward, but she’s your BFF! You can talk to her about anything! 🙂

So maybe just bring it up, and be like, “It’s so cool how much we have in common! Sometimes I worry you think I’m copying you, but honestly we’re just THAT in sync. I’m just not always as outspoken as you are, so you say stuff or do stuff first. You know I’m not copying you, right?”

As long as you and your friend get things straightened out, you should be all set! It doesn’t matter what anyone else thinks. And if anyone comments on it, you can just say something like, “I know! It’s SO cool to have a BFF who’s so close she’s like my twin!!!”

I hope that helps.

Readers, how do you handle it when someone thinks you’re copying, or when someone keeps copying you?

Category: Ask Nikki Tags: BFFnikki

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Comments

  1. Things are going well says

    March 22, 2017 at 6:15 am

    If I was accused as copying, I can’t just ignore it, right? Because maybe it’ll happen more and more; just by accident! What I would do is I would have a long think about it; which is what I usually do. Most of the time it ocures to me that i need to stand up for myself like what Nikki said.

  2. Dorky Baudelaire Girl says

    March 22, 2017 at 4:18 am

    i would go to the mall together and buy different clothes so that you will be NOT coping and buy different clothes for your birthdays
    Thats What I would Do

    Thanks,

  3. How Cow says

    March 22, 2017 at 2:07 am

    Maybe she just admires you. If she does then feel proud. You’re her hero!! 🙂

  4. iHavEaDRAMAfriend says

    March 21, 2017 at 11:18 pm

    Dear Nikki ❤️, I am having a lot of drama right now at my school because my friend is making fun of other kids but I I don’t like it and I’ve tried talking to her…but it doesn’t work!!! Please help me…THANK YOU!

  5. CoolCrystal says

    March 21, 2017 at 8:52 pm

    i feel u girl!

  6. Cute dork says

    March 21, 2017 at 6:04 pm

    OMG she called you copy cat that’s not nice but I just have to say you must be twins!!

  7. QueenE says

    March 21, 2017 at 5:15 pm

    Do what u want don’t let anyone stop u from doing what u love

  8. Unique and Sour says

    March 21, 2017 at 12:17 pm

    If somebody was coping me, I would be first surprised, because you know what they say,” Great minds think alike”.But if she continues coying you, then wear something different. Like, at school if she is wearing the same clothes as you in most period classes, then at lunch go the bathroom with extra clothes and change the clothes you are wearing at the earlier periods. I hope this works. I know it will

    From, Unique and Sour

  9. Nai says

    March 21, 2017 at 11:39 am

    Being in common with ur bff is normal…. no need to worry!

  10. Nikki's number 1 fan! says

    March 21, 2017 at 9:36 am

    I think what Nikki said was true, so do what she said!

  11. This Dorky Girl says

    March 21, 2017 at 7:39 am

    Ask her what this is about and decide that you will wear the most different outfit possible that your friend can’t POSSIBLY have! Try it – it might work!

  12. Hoi- yea says

    March 21, 2017 at 5:03 am

    Me and my bff are the same when every we have a personality test we always answer the same things without even knowing ( but sometimes it can be annoying )

  13. BeenThroughItGurl says

    March 20, 2017 at 10:43 pm

    I went through a period like that where my friend accused me of copying because we’re similar . I just asked her what was up, and it turned out she was having problems at home and was taking it out on everyone else. So she calmed down.

  14. dorky dude says

    March 20, 2017 at 7:58 pm

    just tell her how you feel!she will listen to what you want to do and you listen to her ! BOOM

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