OMG YOU GUYS!!
Remember when MacKenzie stole my diary?!!
I SWORE I would never let that happen again! I have been SOOOOOO careful about where I take my diary and where I write in it. It shall never fall into the evil clutches of that lip gloss-addicted drama queen again!
Well, it didn’t. But it fell into…the sticky fingers of the most annoying six-year-old IN THE WORLD!!
I mean, I have to be honest! I was kind of careless with my diary AT HOME. But that’s because I know my parents would NEVER snoop in my diary. That is a conversation we have had, and they GET IT. My diary is MINE and I need to know I can let everything out in there without worrying who will read it.
I’ve never worried about Brianna because…well…mainly because she can hardly read! Who knew she’d go snooping in a diary?
But she DID! She snooped and then she put it back, the little sneak!! My first clue was when I picked my diary up off my bed and it was STICKY! Oh yeah, when I said sticky fingers, I meant LITERALLY. There was something fruity smelling and gooey on the front AND back covers.
I was about to start screaming right then, but I realized I should see if she’d done any MORE damage. And she HAD!
(My heart is still POUNDING. I am SO MAD!! 🙁 )
Inside she had covered SIX PAGES with her own writing! Well, “writing.” Half of it was just random letters shoved together. Who knows WHAT they teach in that school of hers?? She wrote lots of OMG and LOL, though! And smiley faces and sad faces! Here are some bits I could sort of understand:
OMG my sis is soooooo meen 2 me!!! 🙂
Okay, FIRST of all, I am NEVER mean! I am the NICEST sister in the WORLD. (Except right now when I want to sneak into BRIANNA’s room and find her favorite Princess Sugar Plum doll, pull all its hair out, rip off its head, and flush it down the toilet! But that is a TOTALLY understandable reaction!!) And what’s with the smiley face after that cry for help?! Someone needs to teach this girl about proper emoji usage!
I want a fon. Then I kan kall Brandun.
For a second I didn’t know what a fon was. But then I realized she meant a PHONE. So she can call Brandon??? Like THAT is EVER going to happen!! Um, over my rotting, maggot-infested corpse that has already been picked over by zombies!!! It’s bad enough that she answers MY phone when he calls! And OMG, now that she can sort of spell, WHAT IF SHE STARTS TEXTING HIM???
My BFFS R the BEST!!!
Okay, that one was kind of cute. But Brianna doesn’t really have BFFs. Not really. I mean, she has a million little friends from school and ballet and wherever she picks them up. But I’ve never heard her call even one of them her best friend.
But then it hit me. She wasn’t writing HER feelings. She was writing MINE! In MY diary!!
Which was TOTALLY infuriating!!! But also…kind of sweet? Or something.
I don’t know. I’m STILL MAD.
And my diary is STILL STICKY.
But I guess my lil’ sis looks up to me or something.
I wonder what she’ll think when I’m done with PRINCESS SUGAR PLUM!!!