July 5, 2018 HOW DO I LEARN TO LOVE MY BODY??? Hey Nikki, I’m someone who struggles with how they look. I never feel confident about myself and always think I look the worst with groups of friends. I don’t know how to accept myself and to love who I am. Any advice? 🙁 How Do I Love The Skin I’m In Hi How Do I Love The Skin I’m In, Well first of all, welcome to the club! I think this is such a normal struggle. Which is a bummer—I wish there weren’t so many teens and tweens constantly down on themselves about their appearance. But there’s something comforting about knowing you’re not alone, I think. At least there is for me. And sometimes it helps to remember that other people are probably way too busy worrying about their own looks to be judging you for yours. But you asked how to accept yourself and love your body, and I think that’s the most awesome! Because instead of accepting that everyone feels insecure sometimes, the BEST thing would be to feel awesome about yourself! So I’m no expert – I have plenty of days where I get up and look in the mirror and groan. But! There are also some tricks I’ve found and things I’m still working on! And maybe others can give us some ideas in the comments! Here are my ideas: Focus on what your body can DO. Think about it: your body allows you to move through the world! If you play a sport or play a musical instrument or do some kind of performance art, you use your body! When you speak, run, eat, watch movies, text your friends—all of that is happening because your body is one AWESOME machine! Set a physical goal. When thinking about what your body can DO, make a goal for something you want to train for. Running a 5K, doing 100 push-ups, choreographing a dance to your favorite song. When you see what your body can achieve, it’s hard to be mad at it! (And this isn’t about changing the shape of your body through exercise—it’s about celebrating the cool thing your body can DO.) Focus on what you like about your appearance. There’s got to be something! Maybe you like your hair, your smile, or your nails. Whatever it is, focus on that when you’re feeling down. And maybe take some special care of it – spend some extra time on a cool hairdo, or paint your nails, etc. Wear clothes that make you feel confident. No matter what your face or body look like, and no matter how much money you have, everyone should have an outfit, or a particular accessory they just LOVE. It might be a hoodie from Goodwill, or a pair of perfectly worn-in jeans. Whatever it is, pull it out when you need an extra boost of confidence. Give yourself props for inner beauty. I know this sounds kind of cheesy, but beauty isn’t all about cheekbones and hair extensions, right? I mean, I can think of someone who might be considered beautiful by society’s standards, but she is SUPER ugly on the inside. (Her name might rhyme with Lackenzie Mollister.) I’m not saying outward beauty doesn’t matter. Because it does. It’s one of the first things people notice about us. If I ignore that, I’m lying to you. But it is NOT the only thing people notice. And I’m sure there must be things you like about yourself that have nothing to do with your appearance. Your intelligence, your creativity, what a good friend/sister/listener you are, etc etc etc. Appearance matters. But these other things matter MORE. Make peace with what you can’t change. Obsessing about your appearance doesn’t change anything, but it makes you miserable. And the worst is when you obsess over things you have ZERO control over. Like, if you dislike your shoes, you can change them. But if you hate your height? Or the texture of your hair? Or your body type? There’s no way out of that deep, dark hole! So learn to find the beauty in those things. Because your body is going to be your body for the rest of your life. It’ll be much easier for both of you if you’re friends! I hope that helps! Read through the comments, too, because I bet some of my awesome readers will have more suggestions. What makes you guys feel confident? Tell me one thing you LOVE about your appearance!
SirenOfTheSea says July 17, 2018 at 4:47 pm I also want to learn how to love my body But it’s kinda hard when my annoying little brother and sister say that I am fat
Anonymous says July 20, 2018 at 2:24 am I am bigger than my siblings who are older than me. It’s pretty embarrassing. I feel you.
Miss Dork :) says July 15, 2018 at 6:15 am This is something I can really relate too because I am quite insecure about myself. I always think. Should I wear makeup? Should I lose weight? When I look in the mirror in the mornings when I brush my teeth, I tell myself. “Why do you care what anyone thinks of your looks?” I’m a person who is always standing out and not trying to fit in, I’m always being different. I tell this to my friends. Put post-it-notes around your mirror or somewhere, saying: “You’re beautiful!” “Stand out!” “I don’t care what anyone thinks!” “I love myself!” But not in a selfish way. Get it? And any others that you can think of. Don’t put negative ones. THINK POSITIVE!!! Express yourself through your clothing, like Nikki said. Wear something that YOU like not what anyone else likes, so what if people make fun of your clothing because you’re not ‘up to date’ with the latest trend? You should be proud of yourself not just your looks but your whole body in general. Your body does some pretty cool things and its weird to think that your body can actually do that. For example, when you move a message is sent to your brain to tell you to move your leg or something. I think it’s AMAZING! It’s all so quick aswell before you can say ‘Dork’. If you still feel insecure about yourself then speak to your mum, grandma or any female you trust and could talk to it about, even a teacher. You should love yourself! Don’t care what people think of you! Stand out! Love from, Miss Dork x
Noy-So-Talented Pop Star says July 14, 2018 at 10:47 am I like my smile the best At camp I’m literally one of the shortest kids in my age! But no one has teased me about that. YET.
DORKDIARIES4LIFE says July 13, 2018 at 7:12 pm MEMORIES! you CANT throw it away! because the special word MEMORIES! if you throw it away youll regret it as soon as you do throw it away! you know why? MEMORIES
Agent_Silver says July 13, 2018 at 4:09 pm Thanks Nikki! This is really helpful because I’m really insecure in school or the mall!!
horselover says July 13, 2018 at 3:00 pm ok girl first nobody should fell awekword in their on body second try and find your inner dork
Blue berry sauce says July 13, 2018 at 1:49 pm Someone told me: your body will find the looks that best suit it when your OLDER and people should adore u for who you are
Blue berry sauce says July 13, 2018 at 1:43 pm No one is perfect ,we all feel that way , if people don’t love u for who u r then u should NOT be their friend
Lazy says July 12, 2018 at 8:59 pm It’s super good advice but some people (like me)can’t be bothered to get up
Dorkiest dork in the comments says July 12, 2018 at 8:08 pm I love my teeth/smile! (Even though ppl sometimes bully me for having fangs…:)
Me too says July 12, 2018 at 2:16 pm Be happy with who u r. As long as your great on the inside you will always look great outside
#Strong says July 12, 2018 at 4:39 am All teens somewhat probably go through this problem I myself do. It’s normal. We just have to remember though that God made us in his image and his image of us is beautiful. Everyone is inside and out. It’s not just the people on magazines and beauty commercials. Girls don’t even need makeup to be beautiful (just use natural beauty which everyone has!) Lets just all say one thing say it out loud or whisper whatever, just say these words…… “I AM BEAUTIFUL INSIDE AND OUT AND NO ONE WILL TELL ME OTHER WISE. I WAS CREATED SO I CAN SHOW THE WORLD WHAT I CAN DO!!!!!!”
dorky is my MIDDLE name! says July 12, 2018 at 3:43 am i always feel like the same but pretend im the best!!!