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Dork Diaries Book 14

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September 18, 2019

I BETRAYED MY BFF!!!

Dear Nikki,

My friend told me her email password, so I logged onto her account and sent an email to her crush, telling him that she likes him! I was just trying to help! But she found out and is SUPER MAD at me. What should I do?

Frantic Friendship Fail

Hi Frantic Friendship Fail,

Yikes! Okay, I’m going to be real with you. That was NOT cool and your friend totally deserves to be mad. Beyond mad! 🙁

Can you imagine how you’d feel in HER shoes?!

You say you were just trying to help. But even if your intentions were good, this was a huge betrayal. In the future, there are lots of ways to help that DON’T involve pretending to be someone else and telling their big secret.

But we all mess up. If you can recognize that you were wrong, and make clear how sorry you are and that nothing like that will ever happen again, hopefully your friend will forgive you. It might take time, though.

In some cases when you mess up big like this, you should try to fix it if there’s a way. I don’t think there’s anything to do in this case, though. Saying something to the crush about how it was really you writing will probably just make a bigger deal of everything. Only do something like that if your BFF wants you to.

No matter how sorry you are, you can’t undo this. It’s done. So the thing now is going to be earning back her trust.

Here are some steps to earning back trust.

  1. Apologize, genuinely and without any excuses. Take responsibility for messing up.
  2. Listen to your friend’s feelings and don’t get defensive.
  3. If she’s too mad to speak with you, write a letter.
  4. Show her she can count on you, even in little things. If you say you’ll be somewhere at a certain time, be there. If you say you’ll bring the candy to the movie, bring it.
  5. Be patient if she’s distrustful for a while. Give her space if she needs it.

I’m sure it’s easy to feel defensive when you believe you were trying to help. But this was a betrayal. The sooner you can own it, the sooner you can both move on.

And let this be a lesson to all readers – never share your passwords with anyone! Not even BFFs! You never know how they’ll try to “help” you!

Have you ever betrayed a BFF? Have you been betrayed? Were you able to forgive and move forward? Tell us about it in the comments.

Category: Ask Nikki Tags: BFF, crushnikki

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Comments

  1. Pretty CCP Queen says

    October 9, 2019 at 12:08 pm

    I wish you luck apologizing !!!!!!!!!!!!
    Good luck again ( your going to need it I know ……. )

  2. Pretty CCP Queen says

    October 9, 2019 at 11:58 am

    Dear Frantic Freidship Fail ,
    What you did was wrong and I like the way you realise it. Your friend might have been nervous to tell him she likes him . So she’s probably having a meltdown about it. You need to respect her feelings.

    Pretty CCP Queen

  3. tigee says

    October 9, 2019 at 11:46 am

    good advice

  4. Ellie 3 says

    October 9, 2019 at 11:16 am

    You should keep passwords to your self

  5. Dorky 145 says

    October 9, 2019 at 11:14 am

    Nikki is the best! 🙂

  6. BAT GIRL says

    October 9, 2019 at 9:09 am

    SAME I WENT ON MY BFFS LAPTOP SHE YELLED AT ME AND I NEVER SPOKE TO HER AFTER THAT

  7. DORK GIRL says

    October 9, 2019 at 9:04 am

    YOU ARE SOOOOO DORKY FUN

  8. Anonymous says

    October 9, 2019 at 12:24 am

    Dear niki
    How can u tell if a boy likes u or doesn’t like u

  9. Sweet little princess says

    October 8, 2019 at 9:58 pm

    Good luck

  10. #oops says

    October 8, 2019 at 9:26 pm

    That is awful hope she talks to you soon!

  11. Nervous Wreck says

    October 8, 2019 at 8:16 pm

    That friend should’ve not told her her email password. Passwords are meant to be kept a secret, right???

  12. Love says

    October 8, 2019 at 7:43 pm

    Im with comment 193 and 182 some people are kinda attacking this girl we all know she did wrong but some people are being mean to her yes she made a mistake and she is trying to fix it and there is no reason to all out attack her

  13. SassyUnicorn#1 says

    October 8, 2019 at 7:36 pm

    Hey, SecretlyShe Ra!
    Girl or tomboy doesn’t really matter all that much. Honestly, I bet anything. ANYTHING that you are not the only tomboy. I promise.
    Vsco girls. I have never been one, and I am not sure I want to be. SKSKSKSKSKSKSK has been getting on my nerves. It was popular for a while, but then it fizzled down, thank goodness.
    Anyway, if being a tomboy is you, don’t let that tear you down. I’M A TOMBOY…that’s no secret! Even though my pen name might not back that up, I enjoy slightly loud (but not too loud) activies, and I don’t mind boys. That’s how I am. Some boys are dumbheads. But not all!
    Being a tomboy has no fault in it.
    If people tease you, hold your head high and ignore them. (Advice easy to give but sometimes hard to follow,) but if you try, it’s not all that hard. Plus, they probably won’t tease you anyway.
    In fact, fancy girls are SOOOOOOOOO obnoxious! Or at least most of them! High heels. I hate them! And dresses are my worst enemy!
    There’s nothing wrong with being a tomboy.
    Nothing.
    At all.
    Love, High Hopes and Stuff,
    SassyUnicorn#1

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