WHEN YOUR CRUSH MAKES FUN OF YOUR FRIEND

Today’s question comes from Natasha, who writes:

I have a crush on a boy, but he makes fun of my best friend because she’s short. He calls her shrimp, shorty, and other mean names. He’s a bully, but I like him because he’s cute.

I try to stand up for her, but no words come out my mouth. I just look at the ground when he makes fun of her. And she tries to stand up for herself, but it comes out wrong.

I don’t know what to say to him or her. Should I tell my teacher, or just leave it alone and make my crush laugh at my best friend?

My Advice: 

Hi Natasha! This crush must make you FEEL crushed, literally! I mean, how totally inconsiderate can a guy get when he makes fun of your BFF? And on top of that, he’s your crush!

I know it’s tough to resist a cute boy, and I also know it can be hard to stand up for someone else.

It takes serious guts to say, “Hey you, big bully! You’re mean, it’s SO not cool, and we’re not gonna take it!”

But still, if we can’t trust our BFFs to stand by us and back us up, then really, who can we trust?

So, here’s what I think you should do:

Pull your best friend aside and say, “I feel pretty bad because I stared at my feet when I SHOULD have had your back! I’m so sorry I didn’t stick up for you, and I promise I’ll be a way better friend going forward!”

Then tell her you’ve come up with some clever things to say next time he gets mean. (That’s right…you can totally take credit for the stuff I’m about to write!)

Some of those things include:

• Be a bigger person and stop laughing at smaller people!
• Stop calling her shrimp. Good things come in small packages!
• We can tell it makes you happy to put other people down, and really, that’s just sad!

I know it might feel like a bummer to stop liking your crush. But trust me, the world is full of cute boys. The ones worth crushing on also have cute hearts!

(Okay, so hearts are always kind of ugly, with all those valves and veins and stuff, but you know what I mean!)

What do you guys think? Do you have any advice for Natasha?