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HELP! I’M ALLERGIC TO MY CRUSH!!

Dear Brandon,
I have a major problem. My crush at school eats peanut butter sandwiches almost every day. But I’ve got a severe nut allergy, and have to sit at the nut-free table in the cafeteria, which is like 12 tables away from him! He also loves dogs and I’m allergic to those too!!! For me, it’s already embarrassing to have allergies, but the fact that my crush loves things I can never share with him is even worse. How could he ever LIKE me when I’m allergic to things he LOVES??? Help!!

Awful Allergy Alert

Hi Awful Allergy Alert,

First of all, I’m so sorry to hear that you have allergies! Please don’t be embarrassed. That must be a big challenge to deal with, for real.

My best bud, Max Crumbly, is allergic to lots of stuff. He even has an inhaler. It’s really annoying for him, but we still manage to hang out!

Here’s the thing: we don’t pick our friends based on their health issues or things they can’t do. We pick them based on how good of a friend they are and how much we enjoy being around them. So, it’s not about what foods they can’t eat or what animals they can’t be around. We like people because of who they are! 

You say that your crush loves peanut butter and puppies, but I bet he likes other things as well.

Here are a few suggestions:

  1. Ask your crush to meet at a library to study and hang out. You can sit on opposite sides of a table, and food and fuzzy friends aren’t typically allowed in a library, so allergies won’t be a problem. You can ask some friends to come along too!
  2. Chat with him, via text or Zoom (if your parents let you do that). He’s probably got a lot of other interests, other than peanut butter and puppies, if you just ask. You might have more in common than you think!
  3. Have a brainstorming session with your BFFs to talk about all this. I don’t always do that kind of thing, but my friend Nikki always feels better after she talks with her friends. And she’s pretty awesome! She’s so nice and has a really great smile and—oh gosh, I’m getting off-track. Um, anyway, talking to friends is always a good way to work through problems.

Okay, bottom line: Don’t cross a crush off your list because of things that they can’t control. If you like him, find something to suggest doing that doesn’t involve the things that you’re allergic to! 

That’s all I’ve got for today. Is there anything your friends do that makes it difficult to hang out with them? How do YOU handle it?